Tuesday, March 27, 2007

March (27th) of the Penguins

Spring is in the air, golf clubs are getting warmed up, mullets are in full bloom...wait. Mullets? Uh-oh, you know what that means. It must be time for another thrilling visit from the Pittsburgh Penguins!

In honor of our feathered guests (both on the ice and off) I present :

An Ode to a Mullet
Short on top, the sides as well
A party in the back
The sharpest look is always on
Those clad in yellow and black

You grow with pride your feathered 'do
To represent your city
And those of us with normal hair
You look upon with pity

From Crosby's Crowd to Fleury's Flock
Those curly tendrils flow
But all your hearts and souls belong
To the man called Mario

You toss your locks (and then your beer)
With a high and mighty air
For all bow down to the glory of
That lovely Pittsburgh hair

Special thanks to Amanda for the inspiration...

But enough silliness. It's time to get down to the real nuts and bolts with another round of the $64,000 question - which Caps team will show up today?

Will it be...

...the team that blows a 4 goal lead?
...the team that plays solid defense yet can't score to save their lives?
...the team that phones it in?
...or will it be the elusive creature that is the hard-working, high-scoring, lead-holding team?

Only time will tell. And that, my friends, is what makes being a Caps fan so much fun. This team is, um...well, they're like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.

It would be nice if the Caps avoided a sweep and put in a good, solid performance in front of what is sure to be a packed house tonight. The Pens are a tough team, a playoff team fighting for the division lead and home-ice advantage. I think all Caps fans would agree with me that putting a crimp in those plans might make for a delightful Tuesday evening.

First, of course, they have to get past Crosby.

Er...it appears we've interrupted his meal. Sorry, Sid.
Sorry, Mario.

Then of course there are the other youngsters...

Staal, Malone and Malkin can be lethal in their own right.

And don't forget about...um...those...other guys.

The Penguins have a pretty potent power play, ranked 5th in the league.

Wow. Look at that setup!

You also have to get past their muscle...

Laraque, Ruutu and Roberts. And don't discount their offensive ability, either.

The Penguins do have a weakness or two, though. Take their defense for example.

Look at them - they can't even find the puck!

Oh, good. The Penguins' fans are here.

Nice mullets, boys.

Hey, wait!

Where's everyone going?

Oh. Of course.

I should have known.

Hi, Mario.


george said...

hahaha, exactly what i needed after a long day of work: mullets and fuzzy, flightless birds on ice skates. i have nothing remotely substantial too add cos i'm tired, but i am wondering myself what team i'm gonna be in for tomorrow since i actually get to be present (possibley in goalie pads, just in case the 400's get too rough).

Shelby said...

You just completely made my day. Thank you for that.

Keep an eye on the boys for me. I'll be gone for a week and a half and I'm not sure if I'll be able to check the scores or watch any games. Oh goodness...I'm scared.

Tyler said...

Get out the brooms, Let's Go Pens!!

As a huge fan of penguins, both animal and human, I thought your post was very entertaining. I loved the pictures! And look for me in my Mario jersey tonight. ;)

(minus the mullet)

CapsChick said...

george: Be careful! People on both sides start to act a bit crazy when these two teams meet in battle. Maybe bring a goalie stick, too...

shelby: You know if they win, of course, you're not allowed to come back. We can't risk messing with any sort of aura or whatever ;)

tyler: Hahaha, I'm so glad you took that in the spirit with which it was intended. Of course, unless you're going to be sweeping up after the Caps' victory celebration I'd put that broom away! (And I'm not sure I believe you about the mullet...)

hockeygirl said...

You have no idea how much that cheered me up.

No, really.

Elly said...

Oh ouch. I think I just simultaneously choked on my coffee and laughed so hard I pulled something. Thank you.

Elly said...

Oh, and thank you for the vintage Jagr mullet. Seriously, between that and the song and then the penguins... :)

Steph said...

Oh I shouldn't be allowed to laugh that hard in public places. Amazing.

CapsChick said...

Aw, shucks...'tweren't nothin'.

Yeah, I don't know why I just got all "Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel" there. Anyways, glad you guys enjoyed it - I'll be honest, the whole thing just made me laugh...glad to see others share my sick sense of humor :)